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Tempey Jorissen

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(no subject) [Nov. 15th, 2006|03:34 am]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |bewildered and angry]

So the other day, me and Brian were shopping at Wal*Mart. It must have been like late at night because it was really empty. I, as usual, got stuck pushing the cart, which contained some random items and this pillow that Brian wanted- and it was the very last pillow. Remember that. It will be important later on in the story.

So anyway, we go to pick out some ice cream in the ice cream aisle, and not wanting it to get in the way, I leave the cart at the edge of the aisle. I had the words of Dane Cook in my mind... "You never leave your cart. God forbid somebody comes into the store and wants exactly that shit. And they're like, 'What? Jackpot! This is everything I wanted.'" ... but it was SO CLOSE to us that I thought ownership of the cart was rather obvious. As you have no doubt guessed, I was very, very wrong.

When we picked out our ice cream- which didn't even take that long, due to the tyranny of Brian- the cart was gone. Since we had both seen it there, barely a minute before, we were extremely confused, because let's face it, who actually takes someone's cart if they already have like 15 items in it?

When we found our cart, mere minutes later, it had an additional, oh I don't know, maybe FIVE HUNDRED items in it. Bewildered and angry, Brian and I convened in a nearby furniture aisle to discuss our options, since reclaiming the Cart of Five Hundred Items seemed a daunting task. We finally agreed just to cut our losses and take the pillow, since it was the only thing of which we couldn't get a new one, and let the cart thief have our other stuff, which was buried too deep for the eye to see. We needed to hurry, as Brian's hand was getting cold from holding the ice cream (it was Reese's Peanut Butter Cup ice cream, by the way).

Upon confronting the man, I naively assumed that he would be apologetic and meek after learning he had taken our items. Brian was doing his whole "being nice" thing, where he is all nice, and was like, "if it's not too much trouble can we at least have the pillow?" The cart thief was acting extremely resentful and put-upon, as though we were inconveniencing his thieving self. He was all, "it's buried under all that stuff, I would have to move everything else out of the way." Brian was still being all nice, so I was like, "Buddy, you took our cart." I thought I had him there, but no. "Well it was just sitting there." So I lifted up the tortilla chips on top of Brian's pillow, Brian took the pillow, and we left, once more bewildered and angry.

As it turns out, the pillow was mismarked and cost like twice as much as we thought, so Brian didn't even get it. It also turns out that the cart thief was a Wal*Mart employee, which of course made us even more bewildered... and angry. Also, we saw Man of the Year that night, which I didn't really like that much. Also, my friend Gaydos going to fill the Flushed Away standee (which is a balloon in the shape of a toilet) with helium and float it around the lobby later this week. Also, random strangers stop me in the street and ask me what movies are coming out soon.
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does everything have to be a contest? yes, it does. [Oct. 12th, 2006|12:21 am]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |hungryhungry]

Timpeylane (12:06:04 AM): i should mention that i read the hitchhikers' guide books yesterday
Timpeylane (12:06:09 AM): (again)
Timpeylane (12:06:14 AM): since we're talking about good literature
Anjerkula (12:08:20 AM): i hate you
Anjerkula (12:08:23 AM): you're more literate than I
Timpeylane (12:08:29 AM): i know
Anjerkula (12:08:34 AM): I can't read that stuff in a day
Timpeylane (12:08:46 AM): it must be hard for you to admit that, but i won't be an ungracious winner
Anjerkula (12:08:54 AM): I can, with nothing more to do, read a pratchett book I've already read in a day
Anjerkula (12:08:57 AM): but still
Timpeylane (12:08:59 AM): i'll just bask privately to myself
Timpeylane (12:09:16 AM): and go read a few pratchett books
Timpeylane (12:09:27 AM): over dinner
Anjerkula (12:10:12 AM): die
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(no subject) [Sep. 30th, 2006|01:30 am]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |chipperchipper]

last night right when i was about to leave work, at like 11, they told me i had to transfer one box of each candy all the way across the theater, but then it turned out that i didn't have to after all. so i was there till like 11:30 which sucked cause i wanted to see the guardian screening. but luckily i got off before the screening, so we chilled in the lobby for like an hour and a half before they finally decided to start it.

it was 95% loaded for about half an hour. so like, i was really tired at that point in time because it was almost 1, but also happy that i got to see the movie, because i had been looking forward to it. Well... I don't know if it would have been different if i weren't so tired, but that movie didn't end. ever. there were like 4 points that i thought it was going to end, but it never did.

i'm 90% sure that i'm still in the movie theater, dreaming about updating my livejournal. which is really kind of a lame dream. i wish i were having one of those dreams where i'm the pilot of an x-wing. or the one where i'm a spy like in splinter cell, infiltrating some building or something.
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(no subject) [Sep. 8th, 2006|02:18 am]
Tempey Jorissen
brian just drooled on his keyboard
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who knows [Jul. 16th, 2006|12:50 am]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |exhaustedexhausted]

Hey everyone, I guess it's been a while since I've updated, sorry. Me, Tom and Brian got this house that's totally awesome, you should come check it out. My room's gonna be cool once its decorated but I don't have a desk.

Even though we fight a lot and I'm reminded hourly about how fat I am, we've had some good times, the most recent of which include Brian cracking an egg over my head, me burning everything down, and Tom making raw hamburgers for dinner. We take nightly trips to Wal-Mart at bizarre hours of the night, so bizarre that I no longer consider any time of the day "late" or "early" except the times I'm expected to wake up and go to work. (those are considered "early").

On an unrelated note, I keep collapsing from exhaustion at work. Other than that, it's going well. We've recently started running out of important concession stand stuff, like nachos, hotdogs, candy, pickles, etc., which causes angry customers, sadly. We ran out of ice on opening night of Pirates of the Carribean, and today we ran out of carbon dioxide for the soda machines. And yesterday we ran out of oil for the popcorn.

Hey, Anne Walker.

So like, I took this test online that's supposed to tell you what your ideal career would be. I got the same answer that I did on a similar test back in 10th grade: an embalmer.

I mean, what the hell? An embalmer? What part of "has acted in a play" or "reads for pleasure" leads them to believe that I would enjoy filling dead people with fluids every day? Whatever. Out of disgust for my future, I'm going to bed.
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I went to st. augustine and... [Apr. 27th, 2006|02:19 am]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |exhaustedexhausted]

kissed a frog!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

looked into a furnace that was used to heat cannonballs in order to set ships in the harbor on fire back when they actually did that!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

took a picture of my friends being joyous by a fort looking thing!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

took a picture of my friends standing there by pretty architecture and scenery!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

looked contemplatively at the sea!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

And that's not all, but it's about time I stopped copying code for pictures and pasting it onto my journals because that is far too monotonous and tedious a task for a person with such a creative mind as mine. Also maybe I have ADD. And... the light from the computer screen is hurting me because I'm tired.
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A journey to the past with my brother [Apr. 26th, 2006|01:16 am]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |nostalgicnostalgic]

BowlingBoy84 (1:11:13 AM): so, you're like, 19
Timpeylane (1:11:22 AM): that's what they tell me
BowlingBoy84 (1:11:35 AM): well, at least in 2 years i'll be older than you
Timpeylane (1:12:10 AM): speaking of things we said when we were younger
Timpeylane (1:12:49 AM): i'm sorry for telling you that i knew where daddy's gun was hidden. i didn't really, and if i had i still wouldn't have shot you. i feel really bad about that
BowlingBoy84 (1:13:01 AM): well you should
BowlingBoy84 (1:13:23 AM): now, if you'll excuse me, my boots are getting dirty
Timpeylane (1:13:47 AM): I'm... i'm... i'm not a cry babyyyyyy [crying smiley]
BowlingBoy84 (1:13:56 AM): this goes here
Timpeylane (1:14:03 AM): and that goes there
BowlingBoy84 (1:14:12 AM): and samantha goes everywhere
Timpeylane (1:14:12 AM): and samantha goes everywhere
Timpeylane (1:15:58 AM): k well i have to go now
BowlingBoy84 (1:16:25 AM): fine
BowlingBoy84 (1:16:29 AM): jumboburger
Timpeylane (1:17:59 AM): shut up i have to go wash my meathookers
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because we're retarded [Apr. 12th, 2006|12:23 am]
Tempey Jorissen
eigthball121886 (11:23:41 PM): HAHA GO GIRL!
Timpeylane (11:24:19 PM): NO! myspace is for highschoolers!! i feel so... dirty
eigthball121886 (11:24:31 PM): lol
eigthball121886 (11:24:36 PM): you have ur virginity to myspace
Timpeylane (11:24:59 PM): wait, are you saying i'm not a myspace virgin anymore?
eigthball121886 (11:25:06 PM): NOPE
Timpeylane (11:25:17 PM): NOOOoooooo!!! this is all your fault!!....
eigthball121886 (11:25:22 PM): no its not
eigthball121886 (11:25:23 PM): u liked it!
Timpeylane (11:25:38 PM): it hurt the first time
eigthball121886 (11:25:49 PM): i bet
eigthball121886 (11:25:54 PM): but you liked it more and more
Timpeylane (11:26:02 PM): now i'm addicted
eigthball121886 (11:26:13 PM): damn girl
Timpeylane (11:26:18 PM): i'm... *sniff* a myspace whore
eigthball121886 (11:26:23 PM): watch urself
eigthball121886 (11:26:31 PM): you cant talk like this in front of guys
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Go, go, go! [Apr. 8th, 2006|07:22 pm]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |morosemorose]

Got this from Amanda's Myspace bulletin

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and current street name)
Shane North/South
Darn, I was so hoping to become a rockstar, too. There goes that plan.

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy)
Wanelda Skittles

3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME: (first initial of first name, first two or three letters of your last name)

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite animal, favorite color)
Rhinocerous Green

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born in)
Lane Beaufort

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your mom's maiden name spelled backwards)
Enal Namsset

7. JEDI NAME: (First name: 3letters of you last name + first 2letters of you first name; Last name: First 2letters of moms maiden name+first 3letters of the city you were born in)
Jorte TeBea

9. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, then your automoblie)
The Green Cavalier
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(no subject) [Apr. 4th, 2006|05:26 pm]
Tempey Jorissen
[Current Mood |enthralledenthralled]

So, people who go to schools that are not UF, how did your basketball team do this year?
Oh, really? Did they? How nice.

"We're trees out there" -Joakim Noah
"Humpty Dumpty. You guys look at him as a 3-point shooter. Hey, he was a monster on D tonight.'' -Joakim Noah (on Lee Humphrey)
"I can't even count how many times he freaked out the Bruins by just standing in the lane, waiting for them to TRY a shot." -Gene Wojciechowski (on Joakim Noah)
"He's not a stiff at all." -Arron Affalo (on Joakim Noah)
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